Monthly Archives: October 2013

I am Malala

“Katie?” I hear quick shuffles down the hall towards my room. “There’s a program starting I think you’d enjoy.” Dad calls. “It’s about the little girl from Pakistan.” I jump out of bed and join him in front of the … Continue reading

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The Warden

“Little Warden’s back,” says Dad, shuffling across the kitchen with his wrists and ankles shackled together with imaginary chains. Taking a break from The Godfather, Dad asks if I want to walk the dogs with him. Crisscrossing the field, I … Continue reading

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The Good, the Bad, and the Banana. (by the Head Bottlewasher)

Bl**dy censors! Cut all the X rated juicy bits out of my last blog so they did! Outrageous!!! I know, I know, dear reader – you’re as outraged as I am. And very concerned about the impact on my fragile … Continue reading

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Crystallized Ginger

“I washed my teeth with Poligrip this morning.” Says Dad. Poligrip is a denture glue. “It’s because you’re anti-Christian that you forgot.” Dad says when I explain the lack of twenty-dollar bills in his bible. “If I had Lady Chatterton’s … Continue reading

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Rita vs Hedwig

“Rita, is that you?” Dad asks when I phone. “Rita!” He says with his arms open when I walk in the door. “Well, Rita. It’s another beautiful day.” He says while we watch TV. A phone rings in the background … Continue reading

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Jackass

“I should say ‘donkeys’, not ‘jackasses’,” Says Dad, as we walk past the noisy hoofed animals next door. “I wouldn’t want the neighbours to think I’m talking about them.” In June 2010, the neighbours filed a petition in the Supreme … Continue reading

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